What 2 do 2 lessen the effects of the stress in your life?

[momof3]

There are not many days my chest does not hurt anymore.  I feel like I am carrying the weight of the world right on it. I cannot get enough air and my neck and shoulders are stiff and sore.

I'm trying St. John's Wort, multi-vitamins, L-Tyrosine, & time by myself each day.  Nothing seems to help.  But then, I don't know how much worse it would be without those things.

[luvmyboy]

Please check the symptoms of heart trouble on the web.  I was out walking one day and has a funny feeling in my chest, went home and checked the symptoms and went for a ride to the ER.  It could be serious, and it could be just stress.  Also, try some stress-reducing exercises.

I'll be praying for you to feel better.

Dottie

[Truebluemom]

There is no doubt stress takes a tremendous physical toll.  I would not be surprised if quite a few of us have health problems related to the unrelenting stress from caring for RAD kids.  I developed some real health issues after getting our girls.  I've spent years and $$ trying to get healthy again. 

So sorry you are having these problems.  I hope you will find the destressors you need.  Any possibility of periodic massages?  How about an exercize group - maybe yoga type - something that emphasizes muscles and relaxation. 

God bless.  TBMom

[bijou]

Stress definitely takes its toll on us over time and I am not even sure once the damage is done, that it can be undone.  If I had it to do all over again, I would take more time for myself, despite the guilt trip that if I did anything for me..... I only cared about me.

Even when they no longer live with you, they can be stressful, but it is much better once they leave.  That is the one great de-stressor.... they leave.

Bijou

[justine]

Momof3, i would go to the doctor's to check this out.    If it is "just" stress, it doesnt mean that it isnt causing physical harm to your body.   It may be that if you cant change the situation you are in (ie. radland) that you may need medication to lessen your anxiety so your body can be protected.   I am NOOOOOO doctor, just trying to give you a reason to check it out.

During my older dds last 6 tension-beyond-belief months with us, i developed (in my early 40s), full blown asthma and almost died.   Almost died because noone knew to check for asthma as i had never had it before.....   I was also diagnosed with another potentially serious auto-immune disease during the testing.   Both resolved over the first few years she was gone!   Even though i was told i would "always" have asthma.   I also have very mild psoarsis since my teens, it was much more severe during the darkest years.  This too is back to very mild.

Some docs refuse to believe in the stress=possible physical effects.   Who knows for sure.   I only know what it was like for me.   When ds was put in jail last summer, i had chest pains, often hourly for 3 weeks.   The pain frightened me and i knew that i had to calm down, pray more, trust God with my son, relax and pace myself for the long haul.  Writing to him helped...getting letters back from him helped even more.  The pain went away and yes, i could physically feel it!

Ultimately, i am sorry that you are feeling badly...whatever the reason!   (((((((momof3)))))

[momof3]

I do believe the tightness is due to stress.  I have had this my entire life in stressful situations.  When I get away from her for a few hours, it lessens, but then picks back up as soon as I'm back in the situation.

Thanks for the input.

[karleen]

I have become a firm believer in yoga as a great way to stretch and exercise muscles.  Within 3 weeks of starting, both my sholder and achillies tendon were about 85% better.  But, like the others, I want to stress I'm not a dr and encourage you to get it checked out.

Take care.  ((((((((()))))))))

[traci]

Prayer is the big helper for me and Bible study. I write my concerns down and pray about them. I think yoga would be a great thing for you! Just exercising helps my tense shoulders, it gets the blood flowing through there again. I do have an occasional massage, would like one once a week~it totally transforms my thinking and physical being!! Reflexology~where they work on your feet to help other parts of your body, A friend to vent to, I go shopping, not necessarily to buy anything but to just get out and away, and remind myself to BREATHE.

[MaKettle]

Pa & I got a large tax credit the year our adoption was finalized.  We splurged on a hot tub.  We spend most of our evenings out in the hot tub relaxing & talking (after DD is safely tucked in bed.)

I also go to the gym 5 days a week.

The last one I've mentioned before.  It's called EFT Emotional Freedom Techniques.  http://www.emofree.com/Newcomer.htm  It's a technique that involves repeating an affirmation while you tap on specific acupuncture points.  Sounds a little weird, I know, but it works for me & it's completely free.

[Don M]

Hi all;
   I'm coming back after a while, but reading this thread I was struck by the term "stress reduction exercises" rather than ideas about what to think or how to relax.  So I used a little help from google.com and found:

http://www.dvc.edu/english/Learning_Resources/stress_reduction_exercises.htm

   It makes sense to actually think of exercising by doing things with mind or physical actions, since we are all connected together more than most would like to admit.  Especially the final two I recognize from meditation and martial arts.  The tension in muscles and anxiety in the brain work together, so if you can calm the brain the muscles can relax.  If you can relax the muscles, the brain stops receiving some of the nerve and hormone signals for high alert.

   This list doesn't say it, but two extra "exercises" that might be suggested:

Humor -- Remember the last time you laughed your A** off at a comedy or a silly joke?  Can you get a copy of that and things like it and see if you can get that rolling-on-the-floor deep laugh that makes us even laugh at how crazy we are ourselves in our RADland life and our going around carrying the problems.

Intimacy -- Get out the candles and turn off the lights, have a nice wine and clear soup, subtle flavors and stare into dh/dw's eyes until you forget there is anything else in the world.

Note - if you combine the two and do the intimate staring and candle light while your radishes are in the house, you will find some amazing humor comes out of the woodwork.  It is amazing how our kids will do a huge effort to mock what they cannot comprehend.

[Geertje]

  I go by humor, thats my thing till my last day I'm afraid.
When I was in a near-drowning accident two years ago in Israel (wat a great place to almost die)they rescued me and put me in the i.c where I said many funny things wich to my regret I don't remember (hubby told me later) something like, I look like a zombie, I watched to many horrormovies!!
Can you imagen how I felt afterwards when those nurses came, laughted at me, and I didn't remember anything or anybody from the i.c, aaggrr I wanted to run, but to bad, I was on the drip
 
And about the intimacy, that does wonders (one thing, I dislike candles, I'm non-romantic in that regard, hubby loves them) and I still like to look in his eyes

[blessingsindisguise]

Humor....

I took a stress reduction class one time and our homework one night was to go home and watch a funny movie.

Now, this class was mandatory for senior nursing students and we were very upset. We were always buried in homework. We didn't know that all of our instructors were in on it, and amazingly enough no one else gave us homework that night.  Senior year nursing is a lot like med school, very difficult with classes, clinicals, etc.

Anyway, I remember watching the Muppet Movie and laughing alot.

The next day in class we were all in a much better mood.

Smart teachers!!!!

I know that one of the reasons my hubby and I are so good together is because he knows how to make me laugh.  Just this morning I woke up, went to the computer and he had left me funny cartoons that were right on target.

Anyway, yep to humor....

As for the other....hubby and I got caught making out in the laundry room not to long ago.  Totally appalled our kiddos.

But hey, in my defense, who'd have thunk teenagers would even know where the laundry room was!!!!

 

blessings

[Geertje]

Tja Blessings, you never know what they know (they have a nose for it, when something is going on) LOl, actualy its good, then they se at first hand that marriage isn't dull, like it is presented on tv and movies (I better don't tell were we made out )
I love the Muppetshow (those grumpy old men!!) and hubby has all the movies from Laurel and Hardy and he still rolls of the chair from fun.

[blessingsindisguise]

Geertje,

the grumpy old men are my favorites too!!!!!

blessings

[Truebluemom]

How about a good Mel Brooks film?  We are partial to Young Frankenstein.