Trauma Headquarters and ADSG

Well. I think I really need more help than I thought I would (no, not really).

Hubby had back surgery last week--spinal fusion, rods inserted, and something else that I can never remember.  Anyway, the incision is about 10-11 inches long.  I spent five days traveling to the hospital, visiting for about 45 minutes before ds couldn't pretend to be nice any longer, and driving home.  Getting only little bits of things done, and getting tired of ds being home and nagging me to play outside, even though it's been raining every day.

So hubby cam home on Monday.  He sleeps on the living room sofa, because "it is more comfortable."  Sure, right in the middle of everything.  We have to walk past him to get into either the kitchen or the bedrooms, and don't make any noise. . .  He wants to do as much as possible for himself, and doesn't accept any of my suggestions.

So, between ds wanting to be just like daddy, and rearranging his walker, etc., and daddy not being able to back me up, I'm tired.  I went to my heart doctor today, and the first thing that ds did was to con the doctor out of some candy.  He's been there before, and knows that the doctor can always get candy from someone.  Doctor thinks he's cute. [how come all these people that think he's so cute don't want to watch him?????]

Ds had been comparatively well-behaved until the candy (at least the doctor told him to wait until the visit was over.)  After that, there was no stopping him.  He was smart-mouthed, bossy, loud, insistent.  He was playing with the cat, who only will take so much.  When I tried to rescue the cat, he threw a tissue box at me, and the cat used my stomach for a launching pad.  So, to his room.  Later, when he came out, something else happened; I think it was when he refused to eat the dinner I had fixed, and I tried sending him to his room.  No go.  So I went after him calmly, and ended up holding him on the floor with his arms out to his sides, and my legs holding his legs from kicking me.  Usually he gives up in a couple of minutes, but this time, he kept trying to get loose until my face was dripping sweat.  So to his room when he finally calmed down.

He got ready for bed, and I read him his Bible Story.  Then time for prayer.  When he prays, it sounds like rote, but he asked for help so he wouldn't call Mom and Dad "evil" and other names, and be nice to them and the cat, and have a better day tomorrow.  So he got a hug and a kiss, and to bed.  With light off.  When I heard noises in there, I checked, and he was drawing on the wall with the drywall that he had busted out yesterday. and on and on and on.

I'm exhausted.  It wasn't nearly this hard when it was just him and me, and hubby in the hospital.  Not even when we traveled four days to see my brother, a week there, and four days home again.  When hubby's around, it gets harder for me.

Thanks for listening.  I need all your prayers for patience, and the ability to express the love of Jesus to this little child.

Luvmyboy - Sounds like you've earned your name this week.  Hope it gets better soon.  You're in my prayers.

TBMom

Dottie....how's hubby?   How's that boy of yours?   How are YOU?

Hopefully better... well it surely could not have gotten any worse while I wasn't looking????

Awful, just awful. And I'm complaining....

Sorry I haven't answered earlier.

Boy is doing better, and not doing better.  He's really good when he's not told "no."

It's been a hectic week.  DS was acting up, and to keep him from hitting me, I got him in a hold with his hands in front, and me behind him.  He hit me in the middle of my chest with his head.  Another day, same scenario, only it was his bare heel on my shin, which left a small knot.  The next day, same thing again, only he had his sneakers on, and left a large knot right next to the small one on my shin.

He likes the high he gets from getting us upset.  Yeah, I know, we're not supposed to get upset, but we're human. . .

He has started neurofeedback with his AT.   She said he would be worse until he had the second session. His next session is Thursday. We're working very hard to get him manageable because he's starting HGH therapy in November.  Right now, he's 8 1/2 and about 42 pounds and hasn't gained any weight in almost two years.  I don't want to have to deal with his assaults when he's bigger.

Part of the problem is that he really doesn't like his dad.  Every once in a while, he asks me why did I choose him (dad) for his daddy?  We've been married for 35 years.

Hubby has a hard time being patient, expressing love, and relating to people.  I keep telling him what to say and the tone and expression to use when dealing with ds.

So - - -I have definitely kept up my relationship with Jesus, and plan to do so.

Dottie, I just read this quote on my grown neice's facebook:  "I refuse to sacrifice the truth of God on the altar of my experience"     My hug to you tonite.... :love9:   Keep on trusting.....

Well - -

Here's a new twist.  Took ds to developmental specialist on Monday morning.  He was very insistent that I get him into a hospital soon.  So after seeing his therapist, and discussing it with dh, and calling insurance and he recommended hospital, we have an assessment appointment for tomorrow at 10.

Therapist said if he keeps up his good behaviour, and I'm deemed to be crazy, then it's RAD, but if he loses it and they understand me, they will need to figure out just what all is going on in his little head.  She gave me a good list of questions to ask to make sure that he can be kept safe, as he is very innocent (but still a little terror!)

I've increased my devotions and study and prayers, because I know He knows more about this situation than any of us.