Trauma Headquarters and ADSG

The Forever Child: A Tale of Lies and Love
fairy tale by Nancy Clark; parenting guide by Bryan Post
ISBN # 0-9726830-1-1

summary: The story of a little girl named Ruby Rose who was abandoned in the forest by cruel and neglectful parents and left for dead.  She was found by seven fairy godsisters who took nurtured her back to good health.  Then she is taken in by a childless king and queen who shower her with riches.  The king and queen are surprised to find that their new daughter has a habit of telling outrageous lies. 

Key elements to caring for a child of early trauma:

--The adopted child is your forever child

--The foster child, like any other child, longs to be loved and cared for

--If the child appears to be lying, know that lying is a reaction to fear

--It is important to be aware of the reactions which the child may trigger inside of you, the parent (your child's behaviors may bring to the surface some of your own unresolved issues and it's important that you not blame the child for your own problems and emotions)

--Be patient with your child (Provide an environment of acceptance, understanding, and forever love.  See the fear behind the negative behaviors.  Healing is a process.)

I just got this one. A good reminder as to the reasons behind the lies.
Haven't had my ds, almost 15, read it yet.

I own this book and it is an absolutely beautiful story to be told to every child, but especially to the hurt child.  The first time I read this book I actually wept....in front of my kids.  Because the message is so deep.  That we all long to be loved and to know that we parents have power to help our children experience that, well, that is beyond words. 

~Bethany