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News: "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."  Galatians 6:9
 
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Author Topic: Need prayer for my Bio son  (Read 17364 times)
Kristtie
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« on: March 20, 2011, 10:18:37 PM »

I have a bio son who will be 20 in August.  He has never been an easy child.  He has ADHD and tourettes.  We started doing foster care when he was 8 years old.  Sometimes I look  back and wonder if the reason he is the way he is today was because of us doing foster care.   But deep down I know that is not true.  All of our children has been raised in church and know what is right from wrong.  Over the years of us doing foster care her was ok with it.  My stepdaughter were also.   My son has a lot of rage and we have sent him to many doctors for him to talk about his feeling but he never would.  When he was in high school he started taking pain pills and one of his good friends passed away from taking pills.  After high school we sent him to Job Corp to get his CNA.  While he was there he started using pot.  I did not know this until he came back once he was finished with his school.  He did get a job and has been there over a year now.  He really likes it.   But over the years my sons has cussed me out and I had to call the police on him twice.  He had a plan to move out of our house in Feb with some friends.  The friends already had the apartment but was just waiting on him to pay us back because he wrecked his car and we had it fixed for him.  In Dec I found a pipe and weed in his car.  He was yelling at me and telling me that there is nothing I could do.  So he moved out in Dec without paying us all our money back.
He had been out of the house 5 days someone broke into his car and took everything.  My friend gave him the 500 for ded.  That was back in Dec and he has not paid her a dime back.  I have been paying her but he does not know this.   This past week end he went out and got a puppy and has no money for dog food or vet bill.   I talked to one of his roommates and she wants him gone.  He has been smoking pot in the house and before he moved in they told him that they would not put up with it.  He told them that they are not his parents and they can't tell him what to do.   He has a key to the house and I am going to have the house rekeyed.  I have given him money to help him out but he is just buying drugs.  We have told him that he will not be able to move back in the house doing drugs.  He said that he does not want to move home.  I know that he is going to hit rock bottom soon.  I am asking that you will pray with me for someone to water the seeds that have been planted in his life and for a change.

Thanks
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blessingsindisguise
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« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2011, 12:21:37 AM »

Absolutely can pray.

blessings
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courage does not always roar.
sometimes courage is the quiet voice
at the end of the day saying,
"i will try again tomorrow".
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neitlingme
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« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2011, 07:30:49 AM »

Prayers from here.

And you?  Keep your chin up.  You WILL get through this too.

My SS19 is making many similar blunders.  It is a hard time in a young man's life.  They are so big on ego/attitude yet small on brains/comprehension.  Testosterone trying to find a workable level?  Who knows.  I think it is part of the rite of passage.  Hopefully through his mistakes he will find the better route.  Some just learn harder than others. 
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Insanity is hereditary--you get it from your kids!

2 Bio sons 7 & 9-sweetpeas
DN17- ADHD, RAD, Bipolar and possibly FAE
SS21-sweetpea (ok, at HKU) with some attachment issues due to divorce--currently enrolled in HKU
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« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2011, 07:38:26 AM »

(((((Kristie)))))    So much to worry about.   I will say a prayer that your son will find his way out of this mess without permanent consequences.   Its probably a blessing that his roommates are not willing accomplices to his lifestyle.   Take care.
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bio dd35  freakishly sweet 
bio ds32  recklessly loving
bio ds27  frightfully kind
adopted sibling group at ages 10, 6 and 4
worstrad30  adopted at age 10, left family at age 18
ads27  FAE/rad, we're still looking for a conscience, estranged
add24 P/A Rad.  Unattached, wants the family bene
Jeannie
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« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2011, 08:36:16 AM »

I agree with Neitlingme.... it seems like many young men choose to attend HKU (Hard Knocks University) at that age, even though they have many other good options.  My son (21) is one of them!  I pray that our sons would learn the lessons they need to with body, soul, and spirit intact, and be wiser for it.  I pray, too, for grace for the mamas who care so deeply about them.
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Bio-daughters 30 & 28, bio-son now in heaven, dear son 14 (healing from alphabet soup disorder)
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« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2011, 03:35:58 PM »

Hugs to you, Kristie!

Praying your DS finds his way to better choices and for peace for you!
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Malina
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« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2011, 04:30:56 PM »

Praying for your son, Kristtie.  And for you.
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mom to two adopted children
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DD15, sweetpea with multiple disabilities
Vivian
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« Reply #7 on: March 21, 2011, 10:06:05 PM »

My sweetpea bioson went through something similar at that age.  At the time I couldn't take it anymore and I sent him to live with his father.   After struggling for quite a while he met and fell in love with a lovely girl who wouldn't put up with drugs and her condition was that he quit.  They now have 3 adorable kids.  Bioson has a good job in as a brick layer and his wife is a wonderful mom.  My grand-kids always look happy and smiling.

I think it was a good thing I stopped bailing him out.

Prayers sent your way.
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Truebluemom
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« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2011, 10:49:08 PM »

Praying for you Kristie.  When my overactive ds was little I used to pray he'd survive till his teens.  Then I began to wonder if he'd make it to 21.  He's 24 now and matured a lot.  Sometimes they just need to live long enough to get past stupid.
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ds26  - bio (sweetpea)
dd23 - adopted (rad/borderline personality - sociopath)
dd21 - adopted (mildly rad, bipolar, fae?)
ds20 - adopted (sweet pea)

"Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
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« Reply #9 on: March 22, 2011, 07:44:45 AM »

Sometimes they just need to live long enough to get past stupid.


AMEN!!! angel10
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Insanity is hereditary--you get it from your kids!

2 Bio sons 7 & 9-sweetpeas
DN17- ADHD, RAD, Bipolar and possibly FAE
SS21-sweetpea (ok, at HKU) with some attachment issues due to divorce--currently enrolled in HKU
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« Reply #10 on: April 05, 2011, 08:16:53 PM »

It took my oldest until he was 40  and 22 years of my prayers to get past stupid. He's now married to a wonderful woman, and has a sweet stepfamily.
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Married to dh 37 yrs.
2 stepdaughters, 45, 41 - no contact
ds 43 kind and loving, married 2 yr
ds 41 responsible, married, 2 gc
dd 33 single, RRFTBA
ds 11 adopted RAD
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